Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

What does 'Whose flesh is like the flesh of donkeys’ mean (Ezekiel 23:20)?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t buy bullshit

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I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

‘The Life of Chuck’: Never Mind the Apocalypse, Watch Tom Hiddleston Dance! - Rolling Stone

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

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It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t cotton to rapists

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

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I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I see through liars

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

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Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand how hurricane paths work

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Is Max Verstappen unstoppable this season?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Some men love anal sex more than vaginal sex. Why?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

What is the rudest/meanest thing a family member has said to you?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Is there a correlation between being a medium and mental health?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I can read

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I can count

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I actually pay taxes